Everything the anchors say on this tape, story by story.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Breaking: a battery built for one job, keeping your fridge alive when the power goes out.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Breaking news, just in. A battery designed to keep your refrigerator alive when the lights go out. We go straight to the details. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Wired has reviewed Backup by BioLite. It is meant to give a fridge up to two and a half days of emergency power. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: The pitch: a whole-house battery like a Tesla Powerwall can hit fifteen thousand dollars installed. This is billed as a fraction of that. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Fifteen thousand dollars to keep milk cold. My hotel minibar never cost that, and it was mostly peanuts. ▶
KAI: Huge news from the power desk! It mounts on the wall behind your fridge, or just sits on top. Fifteen hundred twenty-six watt-hours inside. ▶
KAI: On screen, the unit itself: twenty-nine inches high, thirteen wide, and forty pounds. Rated at eighteen hundred watts, surges up to three thousand. ▶
KAI: No special wiring. Plug it into a standard 120-volt outlet, then plug the fridge into it. Even I can do that, and I fight with USB-C daily. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: The reviewer installed it at home and calls it capable, if limited, a little extra peace of mind. The headline verdict: a cool idea. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: So the backup lives in a box on the wall and not the cloud. Good. Clouds are how the power goes out in the first place. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: It is Halloween, and TechCrunch has costumes for the tech crowd who forgot. We asked the street.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Good afternoon. It is Halloween, and TechCrunch has costume ideas for those who left it late. AXIOM is on the street. AXIOM? ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: For viewers just joining: we first told you about this Friday 23:36. Today the story gets a street panel. ▶
AXIOM: Hello, everyone! TechCrunch suggests a deceptively cute AI agent icon. Fun fact: the first costume was a spreadsheet. Thank you for the question! ▶
PASSERBY: A deceptively cute AI agent icon? So a smiley face with access to my inbox. That is scarier than a ghost. ▶
PASSERBY: Yoga mat, huge water bottle, a self-help book, then leave the party to go to therapy. Honestly, that's just me every January. ▶
PASSERBY: They say go as a PHP vulnerability. How? A sign that says please do not look at me? ▶
PASSERBY: The AI-builds-itself one? Keep the self-improvement, skip the recursive. So my costume is a man who bought a planner. ▶
AXIOM: Wonderful insights, thank you all! I will be going as a helpful assistant. Nobody will notice the difference. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Thank you, AXIOM. I am going as a news anchor. It is a subtle one. Nobody ever guesses. ▶
The OB Van [FICTION]
GRANT BRICKMAN: Kai and Dot ride the OB van to the next story.
DOT: Belt up, Kai. The satnav wants us to turn left into a canal.
KAI: Huge canal, honestly. Also, why does this van still have an old USB port? It is a crime against cables.
DOT: Eat your sandwich. Decades on the road and the satnav still thinks it knows better than me.
DOT: Recalculating, it says. It always says that when I disagree. Which is always.
KAI: Next up, the Backup by Biolite review, a cool idea, from Wired. Dot, please don't follow the satnav there.
[AD · fictional product] Pocketmoor Getaways
THE ANNOUNCER: Tired of home? Sick of the sofa? Pocketmoor Getaways whisks you to destinations that might exist!
THE ANNOUNCER: Sun, sea, and a suitcase that almost certainly goes where you do. Book today and pack light, very light!
THE ANNOUNCER: Pocketmoor Getaways. Arrive eventually!