PXL News

TRANSCRIPT

Everything the anchors say on this tape, story by story.

Headlines

GRANT BRICKMAN: While you were asleep: Lara Croft turned 30, and there is now nearly an hour of lo-fi Tomb Raider music to celebrate.

GRETA FOOTNOTE: Also overnight, the director of Obsession followed up with a horror short on YouTube called Mama Bear.

GRANT BRICKMAN: And Oracle introduced its Deep Trust AI Architecture at Oracle AI World, to enforce rules for AI access to enterprise data.

Snake On a Seven-Segment Display is Gloriously Bad (Hackaday)

GRANT BRICKMAN: Snake is back, on a seven-segment display from an old DVD player, and it is gloriously bad.

GRANT BRICKMAN: Now the full story. Somebody has taken the old DVD player's little glowing numbers and taught them to play Snake. Good morning to the numbers. ▶

GRETA FOOTNOTE: Hackaday says José Luis Monteiro and their father built it on a seven-segment display salvaged from that old player. Ada has the details. ▶

ADA: Huge fan of this one. Each segment stands in for a piece of the growing snake, and the segments already sit in a roughly rectangular grid. Moving around makes sense. ▶

ADA: What we are looking at is the kind of seven-segment display you find in an old DVD player, the one that normally just shows you the time. ▶

ADA: Here is the catch. The food is identical to one of the snake's own segments, so it gets confusing fast. But in those first few moments, it works pretty well. ▶

ADA: And the build comes with documentation, source code and a video, so you can follow along. Hackaday calls it gloriously bad. I call it a first prototype. ▶

GRANT BRICKMAN: Remarkable. Reminds me of a teletext page that got ideas above its station. I would play it with my second coffee. ▶

GRETA FOOTNOTE: The article's own philosophy is that doing something badly beats not trying at all. I find that oddly comforting before ten in the morning. ▶

Yōko Hikasa, Yuka Iguchi Join Cast of Wound & Bandage Anime (Anime News Network)

GRETA FOOTNOTE: Wound & Bandage gets two new voices in a third teaser, and a January 9 debut.

GRETA FOOTNOTE: The Big Picture, and it is anime. The Wound & Bandage series just streamed a third teaser. Vera has the board, Roxy is in the lobby. ▶

GRANT BRICKMAN: A third teaser? Do they not trust the first two? Vera, what are we actually looking at here? ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Anime News Network reports the third teaser streamed on Friday and reveals two new cast members. The series debuts on January 9. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Yōko Hikasa plays Matsu Daemon and Yuka Iguchi plays Magical Penpengusa. Both belong to the bandage alliance, an internet community, along with the protagonist. ▶

GRETA FOOTNOTE: And what is the story? I did read this one, but I would like the viewers to hear it from someone with a touchscreen. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: A romantic comedy about the daughter of a yakuza leader and Gō Kiritani, a young subordinate who becomes caretaker. The manga began on Comic Days in August 2024. ▶

GRANT BRICKMAN: So the lead cast was already known and the third teaser just adds two more. Efficient. I only ever got one trailer and a pamphlet. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: What is still open: the report does not say where the series will stream, and it does not name who voices the lead. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: As analysis, a teaser can sell a cast, but whether the romantic comedy lands is a question for January 9. ▶

GRETA FOOTNOTE: So: two new voices, one release date, and a lot of unanswered questions about where to watch. ▶

GRANT BRICKMAN: I will be there on the day, with a mug in hand. Thank you, Roxy, and thank you, Vera. ▶

THE FEED (PXL)

GRANT BRICKMAN: The Feed: three gaming videos are climbing YouTube this Friday morning.

GRANT BRICKMAN: The Feed. Three gaming videos climbing YouTube this morning. Vera, please read the board before my coffee goes cold. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Number one: Why Is She Watching Me… from CaseOh. 385,903 views, uploaded 10 hours ago, about 35,691 views per hour, 1,069 comments. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Number two: Dream Needs To Stop Lying, from Karl Jobst. 1,159,036 views, uploaded 13 hours ago, about 84,972 views per hour. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Number three: Modern Retro Gaming from Scott The Woz. 340,709 views, uploaded 8 hours ago, 1,591 comments. ▶

GRETA FOOTNOTE: Karl Jobst's video also has 4,411 comments. That is a lot of people with feelings before lunch. ▶

GRANT BRICKMAN: Marvellous. Thank you, Roxy. I will watch all three on my lunch break, one tab at a time. ▶

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Weather

STORMY BYTES: London first: 11 degrees now, clear sky, wind 8 km/h. Today's high is 15, low 10, and zero percent chance of rain. A very polite breeze!

STORMY BYTES: Paris next: 8 degrees, clear sky, wind 7 km/h. High of 15, low of 7, rain chance zero percent. Even the croissants are optimistic.

STORMY BYTES: Berlin: 8 degrees now, overcast, wind 3 km/h. High 11, low 7, zero percent chance of rain but a light drizzle. The drizzle did not read the forecast.

STORMY BYTES: Madrid: 13 degrees, partly cloudy, wind 3 km/h. Today's high is 22, low 11, zero percent rain chance. The warmest stop on the tour!

STORMY BYTES: Rome to finish: 14 degrees, partly cloudy, wind 4 km/h. High 20, low 9, and a 3 percent chance of rain. Basically a sunny hunch.

AI-written satire. The text of the news items comes from the linked articles. Plain text