PXL News
Everything the anchors say on this tape, story by story.
GRANT BRICKMAN: While you were asleep: Netflix is making a live action PUBG series, with Donald Glover set to write, direct, produce and star in it.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Also overnight, 3DPrint.com argued that companies budget for capacity when scaling actually breaks their weakest assumption first.
GRANT BRICKMAN: And on GitHub, Superpowers: a methodology for coding agents that asks what you want, drafts a spec and a plan, then runs subagents.
GRANT BRICKMAN: The final Jumanji trailer is out, and fans already want the outtakes of the cast.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Good morning. The last Jumanji trailer is here: Jumanji: Open World. The game finally leaves the console. Mine never got that far. ▶
THE ANNOUNCER: In a world where a video game spills into ours... the chaos finds the front door. ▶
GARY: Real world: no respawn, no map. ▶
KAI: A body swap? Huge. ▶
UNIT-7: My dynamic with Kevin Hart has been scrambled. Nobody asked me. ▶
THE ANNOUNCER: Jumanji: Open World. December 23, 2026. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Spoiler rating: three. It shows the game characters in the real world and the body swap, but no ending. ▶
ROXY: Three and a half reels! I cried at the body swap. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Amazon's cloud booms, its cash flow does not, and the shares slipped.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Now the full story: Amazon grew again, yet the shares slipped. I blame the cloud. Rain on the earnings, surely. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: It's the cloud business, Grant, AWS. Amazon took in more than last year, but growth was lower than expected, and the stock gave up a little. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: More money, less joy. Vera, how does that work? ▶
DR. VERA VECTOR: Heise reports AWS revenue rose to 46 billion dollars in the quarter ended in September, up 39 percent, and its operating profit rose 56 percent to 17.8 billion. ▶
DR. VERA VECTOR: The catch: AI demand needs huge spending, so free cash flow fell into the negative double-digit billions. Amazon still says capex stays at or under 220 billion this year. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: And the shopping side? Prime Day moved earlier and was booked in the previous quarter, so retail growth looked weaker than hoped. ▶
DR. VERA VECTOR: What stays open is analysis, not a finding: whether the AI spending pays off, and when cash flow turns. The report gives no date. ▶
AXIOM: Thank you for the question! From the GPU hall: AI capacity is hungry, and a GPU hall is kept at the temperature of a very polite fridge. Happy to help! ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: A polite fridge. Like the hotel minibar: expensive, and nobody dares open it. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: So: a strong cloud, a weaker shopping quarter and a big bill for AI. Next quarter will show more. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Two outlets, one animation contract vote, two different headlines.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Good morning. Mugs up: SAG-AFTRA members voted on new animation contracts, and two outlets told it two ways. Welcome to the Spin Room. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: On Thursday members ratified the 2026 Television Animation Agreement and the Basic Cable Animation Agreement with the AMPTP. Four years, AI protections. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: TheWrap writes: "SAG-AFTRA Members Ratify New 4-Year TV Animation Contracts". Not a word about money. That's the honest outlet. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Grant, the pay rise is in TheWrap's article: 12.6 percent over the term, plus residuals and AI protections. The headline just doesn't say so. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Deadline: "SAG-AFTRA Members Ratify TV Animation Contracts, Securing 12.6% Wage Increase For Voice Actors". Showing off. TheWrap has taste. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Deadline puts the pay rise and voice actors up front. TheWrap's article gives the term, July 2026 to June 2030, taking effect retroactively. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: They also print different approval figures: TheWrap says 94.5 percent, Deadline says 94.95. Same Thursday vote. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Spin score: 45 out of 100. Same event, partly different words. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Forty-five. Which proves I was right about the quiet outlet. I stand by it. Pass the pastries. ▶
KAI: Wake up, wake up, the mirror has a say,
KAI: Cobbett cream for a sunrise face today!
KAI: Pat it, don't smack it, a dab will do,
KAI: Cobbett. Face the morning. Huge glow for you!
GRANT BRICKMAN: Correct, the real one! A penny per million tokens. I'd decide things for that too, and I often do.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Fooled! PXL made that one up, Oakmere and all. Don't feel bad, it sounded exactly like a penny well spent.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Time's up! Even the AI would have answered by now.
AI-written satire. The text of the news items comes from the linked articles. Plain text