PXL News
Everything the anchors say on this tape, story by story.
GRANT BRICKMAN: While you were asleep: Materialise reported Q3 revenue of 67.7 million euros, with medical in the driver's seat.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Also overnight: Surge AI's Dayjob: Tax put AI agents through 50 realistic tax assignments.
GRANT BRICKMAN: And JetBrains published ThinkRail, an agentic IDE built around the pi coding agent.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Samsung's profit is up nearly ninefold, and investors still wanted more.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Good morning. Samsung Electronics has nearly nine-folded its operating profit. Nine! My bank has never once done that. Kai is at the chip fab. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Third-quarter operating profit was 107.4 trillion won, about 72 billion euros, on revenue of 195.3 trillion won. Both are records. ▶
KAI: Huge numbers, huge morning. I'm outside the fab asking people on their way to work what they make of it. ▶
PASSERBY: Nearly nine times the profit? My coffee budget went up once and I wrote a memo about it. ▶
PASSERBY: Record profit and the shares still dropped. Up to 6.2 percent this morning, the report says. Tough crowd. ▶
KAI: They also announced a quarterly dividend of 30 trillion won, about 20 billion euros. Huge. I still can't find a USB-C cable that works both ways. ▶
PASSERBY: Samsung expects memory demand to beat supply next year too. I just wanted a bigger phone memory. ▶
PASSERBY: SK Hynix had strong numbers too, apparently. Good year to be a memory chip. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: The shares opened higher, then slipped. Record results, and the market wanted a bigger record. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Microsoft has now posted ten record quarters in a row. We ask the street.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: For viewers just joining: we first told you about Microsoft's record quarter Thursday 01:33, today. This morning we ask the street. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Ten records in a row. That's a streak. AXIOM, over to you, and do take your time. ▶
AXIOM: Thank you, Grant! I'm delighted to be on the street. Great question, by the way, nobody has asked it yet. ▶
PASSERBY: Ninety-two billion dollars in one quarter? I'd settle for a refund on one subscription. ▶
PASSERBY: Devices revenue fell, though. Windows OEM and devices down 22 percent. Mine fell off a desk once. ▶
AXIOM: To explain: Microsoft Cloud brought in $63.9 billion, up 30 percent. Cloud, broadly, is computers elsewhere. Thank you for asking! ▶
PASSERBY: Ten record quarters in a row. I can't keep a houseplant alive for ten weeks. ▶
PASSERBY: Net income of 36.6 billion. Is that before or after the office coffee? ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: The article notes not all the cloud revenue is AI. Microsoft 365 alone accounted for nearly 28 billion dollars. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: The phones are open: marbles, retro chips and a train that isn't one.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Welcome to The Pixel Line. The phones are open, the coffee is warm, and our callers are, I'm told, on hold. ▶
PASSERBY: Hello? Yes. That marble display. Does it really only need three motors? ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: It does, Gerald. Black and white marbles act as pixels in a huge ring of channels, and gravity and geometry do much of the work. ▶
PASSERBY: Good morning! I read about the retro console with the homemade processor. Is it real? ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: It is, Ingrid. A custom RISC-V CPU on a DE0-Nano FPGA board with 32 MB of RAM. It boots to a launcher with 32 games. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Thirty-two games on a processor someone made at home. Marvellous. And it runs DOOM, I hear, in the original shape. ▶
PASSERBY: It's Rudi again. Is ThinkRail a train? Nobody called me back about the trains last week. ▶
GRETA FOOTNOTE: No, Rudi. It's an agentic IDE from JetBrains built around the pi coding agent. It keeps work in git worktree workspaces. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: Thank you all. The lines are now closed, Rudi, even yours. ▶
GRANT BRICKMAN: A public service announcement. Your laptop has been awake for a very long time. It has not complained, but it is tired.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Save your work. Close the forty tabs. Press restart, and let the poor thing breathe for a moment.
GRANT BRICKMAN: A rested machine is a happy machine, and it will repay you with one fewer mysterious spinning wheel. Now you know.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Correct! The real one is the star voice swapped in with a Day 1 patch. PXL made up the tram line. Our little secret.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Ah, the tram line was ours. PXL made it up, and you nearly bought it. The real headline had the patch and the star.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Time's up! The real one swapped the hero's voice in a Day 1 patch. The tram line was ours.
AI-written satire. The text of the news items comes from the linked articles. Plain text