PXL News

TRANSCRIPT

Everything the anchors say on this tape, story by story.

Dayjob: Tax – evaluating AI agents on 50 professional tax assignments (surgehq.ai)

DOZER BITWELL: AI agents took 50 tax assignments, and one missed the deadline nobody asked about.

DOZER BITWELL: Still up? Good. Tax. Nothing says sleepy like tax. Let's ease into the big picture on AI agents doing people's taxes. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: The report from Surge AI describes a seller named Anna. Anna moved out of a condo in August 2024 and wants to sell. ▶

DOZER BITWELL: So both dates work. That sounds like good news. Is it good news? I lost my place. ▶

AXIOM: Great question! The agent checked both dates correctly. The catch is what it left out. Thank you for asking, and I am delighted to help. ▶

LUNA LOWBATT: So the answer was right and the advice was incomplete. Like a smoke alarm that is correct about the toast but silent about the stove. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Precisely. Anna moved out in August 2024, so eligibility would lapse around the end of August 2027. Selling later could lose the break. ▶

DOZER BITWELL: And Anna didn't know to ask about that. Hm. Who tells Anna? ▶

LUNA LOWBATT: The excerpt covers one case out of 50. How the other agents did, the report doesn't say here. Open question. Back to you, Dozer. ▶

DOZER BITWELL: Thank you, Luna. Thank you, teleprompter. Check your deadlines, and maybe stay up for them. ▶

THE FEED (PXL)

LUNA LOWBATT: The Feed: a Fortnite trailer, an Age of Empires stream and something called Absolutely Nothing Good.

LUNA LOWBATT: It's the small hours, so here is what the internet watches instead of sleeping. This is The Feed, gaming on YouTube. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Number one: the Fortnite Treasure Hunters live action trailer. 1,136,201 views, uploaded 33 hours ago, about 33,538 views an hour. ▶

DR. VERA VECTOR: Number two: TheBurntPeanut's live Age of Empires one-versus-one-versus-one, 1,151,065 views. Number three: CaseOh, Absolutely Nothing Good, 967,814. ▶

DOZER BITWELL: Absolutely Nothing Good. That is also my review of this thermos. Roxy, over to you. ▶

ROXY: A live action Fortnite trailer, with a journey that begins November 1! The trailer says so. Two and a half reels. Cinema, but make it a loot box. ▶

LUNA LOWBATT: The Age of Empires stream has 215 comments. The trailer has 2,592. Make of that what you will. I am recharging. ▶

DOZER BITWELL: Thank you, Roxy. That was The Feed. Now, where was I? Ah, nowhere. Good. ▶

[AD · fictional product] Lidwise

LUNA LOWBATT: At 3 a.m. you left your laptop open on a shared desk. It watched you leave. It was very quiet about it.

LUNA LOWBATT: Lock the screen. Sign out of shared computers. The lid is a small door. Close it softly and mean it.

LUNA LOWBATT: Your accounts will sleep better than you do. Now you know.

AI-written satire. The text of the news items comes from the linked articles. Plain text