TRANSCRIPT · This Board Can See, Hear, and Think

## This Board Can See, Hear, and Think (Hackster.io)
https://www.hackster.io/news/this-board-can-see-hear-and-think-7f52c749ac70
GRANT BRICKMAN: A tiny board that sees, hears and feels motion, and Ada asks the street what they would build.
GRANT BRICKMAN: A tiny board that can see, hear and think. Ada Flux is at the makerspace with the public. Ada, what are people saying?
ADA: Huge news, Grant! Protonverse Labs put a camera, a microphone and motion sensors on one little board. Would you build with it?
PASSERBY: Camera, mic and motion on one board? Fewer wires. My shed looks like spaghetti, so yes please.
PASSERBY: A five megapixel camera on something that small? I'd point it at my tomatoes and watch them think.
PASSERBY: Does it actually think? I can't get my group chat to think.
PASSERBY: Wi-Fi and Bluetooth already on it. In my day we ran a cable and hoped.
ADA: Love the one-board idea! The article says there's no dedicated neural processor, but small models can still run locally, like spotting objects.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: So it recognises objects, Grant. It doesn't ponder them.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Same as my VCR timer. It watches, it listens, and it never admits when it's wrong.

## Der Sparkassen-Anime ist echt: In "Der Schatten über Anlegion" erwarten uns böse Sparschweine, und das ist kein Witz (GamePro)
https://www.gamepro.de/artikel/sparkassen-anime-der-schatten-ueber-anlegion,3462004.html
GRETA FOOTNOTE: A German bank is making an anime, with evil piggy banks. Yes, really.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: It's real, Grant. Der Schatten über Anlegion, an isekai, which is a hero landing in another world. The bank says no AI was used.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Vera, a bank making cartoons. Is this a finance story or an entertainment story?
DR. VERA VECTOR: GamePro reports the Sparkasse is one of Germany's largest banks, and it has wandered into gaming before.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: So it's not an early April Fools' joke. The article says there's no punchline.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Vera, what's still unsettled?
DR. VERA VECTOR: The report doesn't explain why the bank chose anime. It also doesn't name the studio or the cast.
DR. VERA VECTOR: What to watch: whether the series appears on YouTube as planned in January 2027, and how seriously it takes its piggy bank villains.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: A villainous piggy bank is a real threat, Grant. Ask anyone who has shaken one.
GRANT BRICKMAN: I have always said savings have a dark side. Next.

## PXL Corrects the Record (PXL)
GRANT BRICKMAN: Greta has a list of things Grant said, and none of them survives it.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Time for PXL Corrects the Record. Greta has a list, and I'd like it noted that none of it was wrong.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Grant, you asked if the new touchscreen MacBook comes with a touch bar. The touchscreen is the display itself, a Tandem OLED.
GRANT BRICKMAN: A touch bar is a screen and a screen is a touch bar. I was simply ahead of my time.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Two feet for $330 was not a robot. It's a Hot Toys Sentinel figure from Avengers: Doomsday, made of vinyl.
GRANT BRICKMAN: It was robot-shaped. The ransom note question remains perfectly fair.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: You said the AI decides who you are by your thumb. Touch ID reads a fingerprint. Nobody is being judged.
GRANT BRICKMAN: The AI is one guy, Greta, and he has very good thumbs. I stand by every word.
GRETA FOOTNOTE: Noted, Grant. Corrected. Moving on.

## [AD · fictional product] Detourist
GRANT BRICKMAN: Detourist, the agent that books your trip. You asked for Rome.
GRANT BRICKMAN: You got Rome, Georgia. A four-hour layover. And a seat that is, I am fairly sure, a standing position.
GRANT BRICKMAN: It is an AI. One guy, in the cloud. He is fairly sure he booked it. Still, a trip is a trip.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Detourist. We booked it. Somewhere.

## Real or PXL?
GRANT BRICKMAN: Real! Sharp eyes. The other one came out of our writers room, and honestly, it was close.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Fooled! PXL wrote that bee headline ourselves, and it sounded perfectly respectable. Take a bow, Greta's team.
GRANT BRICKMAN: Time is up! One of those was real and one was ours. The writers are not telling.

AI-written satire. The text of the news items comes from the linked articles.